Blessing Tree

I just wanted to share this with you real quick. 

This year for Thanksgiving I wanted to put a bit more emphasis on the 'Thankful' part. We really are very blessed and we recieve so many things all year. Unfortunately, too often, we just take them for granted.

I found this wire tree in Mom's attic while I was browsing being nosey one day.  She used it in her classroom for different holiday decorations.  I drug it out, cleaned it up and placed it in this vase.  Next, I cut out circles, and tied ribbon through them.

My sister and brother-n-law have already been in for a few days, so each day we have each been writing one thing that we are thankful for and hanging it on the tree.

Its not the best picture, but atleast you get the idea.

I wish every a safe and happy holiday! 

Happy Thanksgiving!!



No! Really! I'm still here!

OK! I know this is really sad and mostly unforgivable, but I have been SOOOOO busy the last several weeks that I have not had time to post.

Please, please don't run away from me and my blog!  I promise I will do better! 
I have lots and lots of projects in the works to share with you. Just as soon as I get time to finish a few, lol.

BUT THE BEST REASON to stick around is I have some really cool news to share.

Want to know?



***Insert Drum Roll here***



http://www.infarrantlycreative.net/2011/11/silhouette-cameo-giveaway.html#comment-32470

How awesome is that?!  Just click the link above and follow her instructions to enter your chances to win.

Good Luck!! Of course I hope I win, but if it can't be me, then I hope it's you.  ;-)

Halloween Decor Ideas

OK I promised you all that I would have this post up by LAST Friday, but as you can well see; that just did not happen.

These are the final 4 (probably... wink, wink) Halloween projects I am going to do this year.

I actually thought I was already done, but I have seen so many cute ideas while browsing some of my favorite blogs, that I just had to do a few more. I just couldn't help myself, lol.

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We are all about Harry Potter at our house these days.  Ty is so into these books. We just started book #4 last week.  We read a chapter each night before we go to bed.  Its a wonderful way to wind down for bed.

Anyway, I want to thank Heather @ diykindagirl for sharing this idea. 

It's amazingly simple, but so cute, and so much fun.  Ty was ecstatic when he came home and saw this mixed into our Jack-o-Lantern patch!

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I just had to create this white pumpkin with spider that I spied over at Country Living.

I actually made this pumpkin following the directions on Country Living website, but I didn't think it look right.  So I painted over it, flipped the pumpkin over (so the stem is propping it up) and redrew the lines.  This time I made the individual curves between each vertical line, rather than spiraling it out.  To each their own I guess.

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My favorite of these four projects are definitely these Pumpkin Bats.  They are just so stinking cute. I stumbled onto this creepily cute idea while thumbing through my mom's Family Fun mag. You can get directions and templates for the eyes, ears and wings from their website.



My favorite helper. I had to get creative and use some
blue wire for the support on the wing. Ty is painting them black.


I used cheap plastic pumpkins from the dollar store, so we could run invisible fishing line through the tops of them and hang them from the pecan tree in the front yard. I also used the eye templates as a pattern, and painted them on instead of cutting them out of foam.  (I didn't have any white foam handy and I did have some white craft paint.)

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Last, but definitely not least:


OK it doesn't really count as a project but it is colorfully relevant.

Your just not fully decorated for the holidays until your toes match the season. ;)


It's another activity packed weekend for us, so I'll be back early next week. Hopefully with some new ideas to share.

Have a Great One!

New Logo!

Check out this New Logo I just created using LogoEase.  It's a free logo design software.  It was easy, fast and best of all free!

For now I'm going to be using with google and my new fb page.  

If you need to a logo for any of your projects, you should check them out.  LogoEase

Big Big Thanks!

When I first started this blog in February I said that I wasn't really sure what direction I wanted to go with it. I only knew that I wanted to start a blog.  I wanted to connect with people who have similiar thoughts, likes and dislikes. 

So, after the overwhelming number of views the 'Jesus Loves You' Jack-o-Lantern has and continues to recieve, I'm thinking maybe I should start posting more of my projects. 

I'm usually doing this stuff anyway, so I might as well share these things with others.

Don't worry, I still plan to write my mommy thoughts about parenting, life and everything in between. (I'm sure you all were panicked about that. I could feel the fear.)  I just feel compelled to add this dimension to my blog. I feel like I have alot to share in this area. (Things to share that people might actually enjoy.  haha)


So a BIG BIG Thank You to everyone who has stopped by to view my pumpkin. I hope you keep returning to see more of what is being created.

I'm currently working on four different projects, and I just finished two others last night.  I hope to have a couple more completed by the weekend to share with you.


~Lynn

Some Days I Just Think I'm Crazy

Am I the only person or does this happen to other bloggers?

So many of my blogs START out with a certain purpose, idea, or story but they END up completely different. I know my mind wanders but some days I find it nearly impossible to keep on track.

For instance, the other day I wrote the blog Just Another Soccer Mom.  Now when I started that post the story I had intended to share was how ironic I found my position.  (That position having been on the sidelines of a soccer game.)

I was going to share with you the story from several years ago about teasing my dear friend Stacy over a bracelet and being a soccer mom.  How I was so baffled by her utter pride to hold such a title.

Then somewhere, about the 3rd or 4th sentence I hung a right and ended up spewing my issues all over you. 

I'm not really sure how this happens.  I'm even more unsure of how to prevent it.  Sometimes I just wish I could type fast enough to write the monologue that runs through my head.  Now THAT, would make for some interesting reading.

It's such a shame.  It was actually a cute story.

Sorry you missed it. Better luck next time.

Bad Hair Day

Pic courtesy of JoePix

THE BAD NEWS

My CHI (hair straightener) died yesterday morning.  Halfway through my morning routine!

Well, my Sunday morning routine anyway.  (I just let these crazy curls go wild the rest of the week. LOL!!)

Ok, its NOT the end of the world. I admit.

BUT it still sucks.


I know your wondering why its such a crappy day, if I didn't even plan to use it today.  Well, its more like a bad budget day.  See I can't budget in a new flat iron until sometime around New Year's!  (Dang medical bills)  Soooo, I just have to make due  I guess.

Curls, Curls, Curls.......................................................................................................................Everyday til then.


THE GOOD NEWS

Atleast I now have an excuse to buy the new Joico ReconstRx Vapor Iron. :-)

(Always look for the silver lining.)
~Lynn

Just Another Soccer Mom

I spent ANOTHER cold evening watching Ty play soccer this evening. Well, I was supposed to be watching but my mind was elsewhere.  To be more specific, my mind was anywhere but on the soccer game.

Mostly I was too busy people-watching.  I was amazed at how many familiar faces I saw.  Granted I know I live in a itty-bitty town and I see the people I grew up with every time I run to the grocery store.  Yet for some reason this felt different.  

I was watching a mother and son as they got ready for the game. She was straightening his socks and sending him out on the field.  I'm not sure if it was a particular mannerism or just the expression on her face that caught my attention, but I suddenly realized "Hey! I know her. We took several art classes together. I didn't realize she had a child this age."

After that, it dawned upon me, that for 6 of the 7 (other) players on Ty's team, I had a childhood relationship with at least one of the parents.  Then I realized that I knew most of the parents on the team we were playing against.  Maybe not well, but I remember their faces in the hallways at school.  This revelation continued as I observed the other two games going on near our field.  It was actually ridiculous to realize that I knew (at least vaguely) 85% of the children's parents.

To me the sad part wasn't that I hadn't realized that any of these people had children the same age (or near) mine.

What saddened me was that I felt like such a statistic. Just another soccer mom.  No one special. Only another face in the dark.

Now don't ask me why.  I don't know why that made me sad.  Maybe it was because it's October and my S.A.D. is already rolling in.  Maybe it was because my sugar level was low due to having to rush to the soccer field after work with no dinner.  Maybe it was because I was surprised to find myself no different from the multitudes of people I grew up with.  Same place. Same Life.

So I just sat there and continued to do a mental roll call.

When I glanced back at the soccer game, it was just in time to see Ty go down in a flash mob of little people.  Layer by layer, the coaches pulled the players up and out of the heap. As they neared the bottom, I saw his coach help him up and she was checking out his face. I saw his coach nod toward the bench and him nod back. As he sprinted across the field with a red mark on his chin that was already beginning to bruise, I could see he was fighting with everything he could muster not to cry.

What unfolded may not have amazed anyone but me, but it definitely amazed me.

Ty ran straight across the field.

Past the bench.

Past his Dad.

Past his Lilly.

Past his Nana.

Past his Pa.

He ran straight to me.

ME!

My beautiful, red/bruised chin little boy ran straight to my arms, climbed on my lap, buried his head and cried.

It was at that wonderful moment that I realized that I wasn't just another face in the crowd. That I didn't have the same life as everyone else.

I was holding My Life in my lap while he cried.

My Ways..... They Are A Changin'

I'm not trying to give myself a pat on the back with this post, (or maybe I am... none of this has been easy) but I have made some serious and drastic lifestyle changes this year.

In January, I quit a 15+ year cigarette habit.

In February, I sold my tanning bed.

I have all but given up soda and I have begun excercising regulary. (Of course by regularly, I mean approx. 3x per week, but I wouldn't set my clock or calendar by my schedule.)

None of the above come anywhere close to comparing with the fact that in June I ended a 10+ year hiatus from church.  (Don't judge me. It went by really fast and I had NO IDEA I had been out that long.)

I'm not sure what happened in my mind exactly, but I suddenly realized just how young my Dad was when he passed away.  I also realized how fast that age was approaching for me.  I have managed to do a lot of damage to my body and health over the years, but I am hoping that I can possibly reverse some of that.  I would like to stick around to see Ty grow up, graduate college and possibly have a family of his own.

Anyway, the point of this little message is that with each change I have made I find myself wanting to make more. My way of thinking is changing.  My desire to make healthier choices is increasing. I'm (slowly) making healthier food choices, like including more fresh fruits and veggies into my diet and choosing whole grains over processed ones.

But as with everything else I do, I don't stop with what's normal.  I take everything to an extreme. (On some level I wonder if I do this purposely to make things more difficult, just so I can fail?... hmmm)

For example: After I sold my tanning bed, I bought some self-tanning spray.  Before I used it, I had this hair-brained idea to research the product and it's ingredients.  Wow! Was I ever surprised?!  I couldn't believe how many ingredients were considered unsafe. There were CHEMICALS! Chemicals that I was preparing to rub into my skin, and allow them to penetrate and soak into my body!

So of course I didn't use the self-tanner. It has taken some getting used to, but I can almost stomach the pale reflection that looks back at me each morning.  ;-)

Unfortunately, this bit of knowledge has been slowly eating away at me.  I kept wondering obsessing what else am I using every day in my health/beauty care routine.  All I can say is that if you, like myself, are equipped with an over-active imagination...... DO NOT RESEARCH YOUR BEAUTY PRODUCTS!

Seriously, do you have any idea what is in the products that most of us use daily?? According to EWG's Skin Deep Database it's anything they want to because the government doesn't test product safety.

Scary isn't it? You can check out EWG's website by clicking here.

Let's take paraben.  Paraben is a very common preservative used in cosmetics and health care products. There have been several studies that these are weakly estrogenic. When tested on the skin of infant rodents, it produced abnormal hormonal effects. Particulary to males which resulted in decreased testosterone levels.  Parabens have also been found to accumulate in cancerous breast tissues.

Now where is paraben likely to be found?  How about in hand lotions, shampoos, conditioners, makeup, etc.etc.  It is used every where. To me one of the scariest things is that I willingly rubbed lotions all over my son as a baby. Lotions that, as I have now discovered, all contained parabens. 

That is only one example of thousands.

So exactly where am I going with this?  Actually I am not sure.  I'm grounded enough to realize that I can't rid myself from exposure 100%, but silly enough to be thinking about making my own products.

I switched a while back to Wen Cleansing Conditioner, to eliminate subjecting my hair to harsh sulphates.  I love, love, love this product by the way.  I'm just wishing I could have it without the few ingredients I find a little alarming.

I'm still in the R&D part of this idea.  It may come to fruition or it may not.  I'll keep you posted.


Disclaimer:  This post was not sponsored by Wen Hair Care.  I purchased my own product and I was not compensated in any way. I am also not affiliated with Environmental Working Groups.  I am just someone with opinions who likes to share them on the internet.

My Debt Reduction Isn't Working (not fast enough, anyway)

Just for the record.

Bills Suck!

I hate paying bills. 

This is not a new revelation for me.

I hated bills even when I barely had any.

I hated them before my truck (which was paid for) decided to lay down and die and I had to buy a new vehicle and shell out money for a monthly payment.

I hated them before my auto insurance doubled because now that I owe for my car, I have to have full-coverage insurance.

I hated them before I had surgery. Now I have 12 different new medical bills to pay each month because they can't just send you one. Each and every single person who walks into your room and says hi, sends you a separate bill.   They have to.   Its federal law.    At least it must be, because it makes as much sense as everything else that comes out of Washington.

I also hated them before I realized that my deductible and total-out-of-pocket had TRIPLED since last year and my surgery is costing me THREE TIMES as much as I had expected. (Also 3x what it would have if I had had this surgery when I was supposed to. Guess that part is my fault thought.)

It's not like my paycheck is very grandiose to begin with, but once I pay bills, what's left is kind of like the crumbs left in your chair after you eat a wonderful, crumbly chocolate chip cookie.

Enough to remind you that you had one, but not enough to do anything with.


Ahhh, but this too shall pass.
My car should be paid for sometime next decade and if I sell enough organs maybe I can keep the hospital from declaring me in default and trying to re-install my uterus. 


Thank you for allowing me a moment to vent. It's greatly appreciated.

Jesus Loves You Jack-O-Lantern

Thankfully my allergy medicine is kicking in a little bit.  My nose is still running like a sugar tree, but I am seriously dehydrated everywhere else, so I guess that's something. 

Anyway, during the short reprieve of my miserable existence that I got last night for about a half an hour, I finished the 'Jesus Loves You' Jack-O-Lantern that Ty and I wanted to make.  I sat up Friday Night and drew out the pattern (what?, what do you do on your free weekends? ....date?! that's crazy!) , but I hadn't had time or hadn't felt like carving the pumpkin since then.

I think it turned out fairly well.  Well enough anyway.

I think I may take it down to church to use on the Registration table for Trunk or Treat in October. 

I linked up here!



AND I Linked up HERE!



Fortunately..... It Was a Great Day for a Picnic!

Unfortunately ........ I forget my allergy meds. 

Which explains why I've been MIA for a couple of days. Mother nature has kicked my butt. 


Anyway, we had a great Church picnic.  Both the young and old enjoyed this beautiful fall afternoon at Carter Caves State Resort Park, located in Olive Hill, KY. If you've never been there you should check it out sometime.  It is an absolutely gorgeous park. 

Since it's basically in our backyard we tend to take it for granted, but Ty and I love to walk the trails and play in the creek whenever we have an afternoon to spare.

Bragging Rights! Whoo hoo!

I just want to take a quick moment to brag on my boy. I AM SO PROUD!!!

This letter was in Ty's backpack this evening:

Dear Tyler,

As your principal, I would like to take this time to congratulate you on being the student with the highest math score of all the kindergarten grade students on the first Early Skills Assessment.

Again congratulations on this achievement! Yadda, yadda, blah, blah, blah, the rest isn't really important.

Sincerely,

Your Principal


I am so proud. I really am.  Yet, I can't help but jokingly wonder who the kindergartner is that scored higher in reading than him.  Ty is reading the first page of each chapter in Harry Potter every evening with little to no help. WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED WORKING ON MATH YET!!!

LOL! I guess it just proves once again that he is just about practically perfect!  ;-) In my eyes anyway!


HAVE A HAPPY AND SAFE WEEKEND!!

Where's the love?

Over the weekend The Foo Fighters protested back when they were picketed by the Westboro Baptist Church. (Google them if you are not familiar with this church, some of their stunts will curl your hair.)

You can watch clips on YouTube.

I'm glad they did.  I'm not sure who is filling those people with the idea that what they are doing is o.k., but I would like to just grab them by their shoulders and shake the bejeezus out them.

Christians are supposed to love.  We are to 'Love one another'. Not just other Christians, but love everyone BECAUSE GOD LOVES EVERYONE. 

We, as a society, are trained to think that there are 'levels of wrongness'.  Different crimes are met with varying degrees of punishments. Even in prisons, the worst of the worst are those who have committed crimes against children. The biggest, baddest guy in there feels better about himself because at least he didn't do that.  We all want SOMEONE to be worse than we are.

But, God does not see our sins that way.  We are all equal in his eyes. We are all sinners, and no sin is greater than the other. 

That is why it so important to "not cast stones". 

Every time they picket somewhere and choose to use such vile names for God's children, (because we are ALL God's children), how many souls are they preventing from ever being saved? How many people are they pushing further from Jesus Christ? What kind of example are they setting?

Part of being a Christian is to set an example by the way we live.  We are supposed make others want that life too because they can see it is sooo wonderful.

God expects us to love. Even the lost. Especially the Lost.

Besides, who wants to become a part of something that is full of hatred and anger?  There is enough of that crap in the world as it is.

My Weekend in Pictures

I finally found 5 minutes to do a little more decorating.

A Saturday morning Soccer Game.

  

 

A Birthday Party for a 3 year old Pirate!

Arrgh!!

A Ladies Jewelry Bingo night at EL Hasa Shrine Temple in Ashland, KY.

In Loving Memory



A watercolor i did of my Dad in 1994, and a pencil drawing
 of Ty that I completed in 2008.

I'm sad today. Yes, sad.  That's the best word to describe how I feel. 

September 19, 1997 is a day that is engraved in my memory. I can recall almost every minute of that day. 

September 19, 1997.  The day my Dad died.  He was 52 years old. I was 21.

In other posts I have touched on how I not so well coped with his death. (Actually a quick scan of my archives tells me I never published any of those, which is for the best.  They're usually not well articulated or sometimes even rational.  No one needs to try to read that.)

Anywho, It took years to get to just 'sad'.  Today, I'm not going to talk about any of that. Today, I'm going to share a poem I wrote in September 2007, the ten year anniversary of his passing.

The weather is turning colder

and the trees are mostly bare.

'Nother Yule Tide log will smolder;

'nother year you won't be there.

The holidays are nearing,

and OH how they come so fast.

It seems I've only turned around,

yet nine of them have past.

Traditions have long since faded,

for they were only done in vain.

And time has failed to offer us

any distance from the pain.

'Tho a thousand hurts have plagued me,

and there'll be hundreds more.

One ache still breaks my heart,

and will forever more.

His eyes, blue, like the clearest sky

with dreams that are just as bright.

I try to teach him everything,

and help him choose what's right.

And 'tho he'll never hold your hand,

or hear your chuckling laugh.

I pray that I can guide him

along the footsteps in your path.

Your body is long gone now,

But to me your legacy remains.

And I vow that in the end, my son will know,

More than just your name.

~Lynn M. Henderson September 2007

**Still missing you after all this time, Dad.**

Station Wagon or Hay Wagon?

This is my car AFTER spending ten bucks in quarters vacuuming it out at the car wash.

I think its time for different approach.

Note to Self:   Next year figure out another way to get bales of straw from farm supply to house.

I don't think I will ever get used to not having a truck.

Our Pumpkin Patch

I stayed up late last night to post this, but unfortunately my Verizon wireless internet connection decided to be unconnectable.  Now its working without a hitch. Go figure.

I actually did managed to get a little decorating done this weekend.  Not all of it, but at least a pretty good jump start. 

Here is a pic of what Ty and I have been calling our pumpkin patch.  I guess it should actually be our jack-o-lantern patch, but whatever.

I had a minor accident with my favorite (of course it would be my favorite).  I dropped it and broke the letter "L" out of the word welcome.  So as soon as I figure a way to repair it, I will add it to the display. (Just as soon as I get time. This week isn't going to any less hectic.)

School, Karate, School, Soccer, School, Church, School, etc.........................(insert horror movie scream here)

Remembering 9/11

Today is a day of remembrance.

Nearly every person in this country can tell you where they were and what they were doing the morning that changed this nation forever.

September 11, 2001

Here is my story.

In 2001, my husband (this was pre-divorce era) and I were working around the Washington, D.C. area for a telecommunications company. We installed telephone equipment in Windstream central offices and sometimes in government buildings that have their own switchboards. On this particular morning we had just climbed into bed in our apartment in Manassas, VA after working the night shift.  We were both exhausted because we had worked later than usual, so we didn't bother with turning on the television. We just turned the lights out and crashed.

Before I could even doze off, his cell began to ring. He cursed loudly and hit the ignore button, because we were used to people not caring forgetting we worked nights and slept days. A moment later, my cell began to ring.  I picked it up, looked at the caller ID, saw it was his Mother and tossed him the phone. 

"You might as well answer now," I said "rather than later."

He grabbed the phone and grunted out "hello" into the speaker.

As soon as he answered the phone, I could hear his Mother screaming on the other end.

"We're under attack! They've flown a plane into the World Trade Center! We're being attacked!"

We both shot straight up out of bed, and I grabbed the t.v. remote. 

Sure enough, as soon as I turned it on, there on the screen, was live coverage of one of the towers burning.  As we stood there in shocked silence watching , a second plane came into view and struck the second tower.

I'm sure you are wondering, as I myself have on several occasions, if only one plane had hit the WTC when his mother called, how did she know it was an attack?

It's possible that it was just her pure panicky, pessimistic, dooms-day personality. More likely it was because she already knew, because the government already knew.  (No, I don't want to get into the government knew what- when debate.)

My Father-in-Law was a Job Superintendent for a railroad construction company. They were doing some track work in Fort Bragg, NC at the time.  When the first plane hit the tower, the base was put on lock down. No one could go in and no one could leave.  As the man in charge of the railroad work, I believe that my FIL was told of what the "possible" scenario was, who in turn told his wife. 

I cannot begin to put into words the fear that I was experiencing that day.  As the events unfolded throughout the day, I was sure that it was just going to continue to worsen.  I was desperately pleading with my husband to go home.

I wanted to face whatever was coming (which in my mind was Armageddon) from the safety of my eastern Kentucky hills.  With my family.  I wanted to be home, NOT 30 minutes from the Capital. Not in a town where I knew no one, other than my husband and a few co-workers.

After the attack on the Pentagon, we received a call from our supervisor that all of the buildings that we worked in were under a lockout for the remainder of the week.  All employees would have to be re-screened for security clearance, so that meant we could go home.

It was the longest and quietest 6 1/2 hour drive we ever made together.

Finally, when we made it home, all I wanted to do was to just hug my family and count my blessing that we were all safe. Together.

Today, my prayers will be with everyone affected by those terrible events 10 years ago. For those who were lost and for those who lost.  For the heroes and those they saved. For the volunteers who went to help and those who make it their job everyday.

I will always remember.

Busy, Busy Weekend Planned

Sleepover/1st Soccer Game/ Fall Decorations/ 2 Weddings (but thankfully no funerals)

I always begin to get excited about outdoor decorating at this time of the year. I suppose it's because all of summer's colorfully vibrant glory is beginning to fade, and I yearn for a little spice in the curb appeal.

This year I have been even more enthusiastic. I get to decorate my Mom's house instead of mine!  Her house is much bigger/nicer and already has a significant amount of curb appeal.  So I'm super pumped!

I patiently waited for Labor Day to pass (because fall decor before labor day is like wearing white after).  Of course, NOW the stupid weather certainly isn't cooperating.

Rain, Rain, RAIN!

And it's cold rain too, YUCK!

Anyway, I have all of my fall decorations waiting patiently on the porch. Just as soon as the rain lets up for an hour, I'll be all over it like maple syrup on hotcakes!

I carve Ty a Funkin each year and now we have a total of 6 for our display. I've already carved this year's addition and I can't wait to see them all arranged.

What?! You don't know what a funkin is?!   Its a faux pumpkin made from foam that you can carve or decorate.  The best part is that after all of that hard work, it doesn't rot in a week! They are a little pricey (anywhere from $10 to $30, depending on size); but I buy mine a year ahead of time when they are on sale. I can usually get them for about 40% off, so thats not too bad.


Unfortunately, I won't be able to do any decorating this evening even if it's not raining because Ty's little brother is staying all night.  (His little brother staying all night isn't unfortunate, only the no decorating part. Just thought I had better clarify.)

We are so excited, this will be Ty's first overnight guest and the first time Toby will stay all night with us.

Atleast we think he is staying all night. It's quite possible that there may be a middle-of-the-night child exchange. He IS only 3. Nonetheless, we're gonna give it an honest effort, hope for the best and be satisfied with however it turns out.

My only reservation/concern/worry, whatever you want to call it, is that Ty has his first Soccer game at 9:30 Saturday morning.  This means I get my first experience of getting TWO boys up, feed, washed, dressed and out the door on a schedule. I am certain that I will have a new found respect for Lilly after that. Or maybe just pity. Either way, I'll be walking in someone else's shoes when I don't do a great job walking in my on when it comes to meeting a schedule.

Then after the game and all little boys have been delivered to Lilly, I have a wedding and reception to go to.  Actually, I have two, but since I haven't figured how I can be in two places at once, I am just attending the one closest to home, which incidently has the guests from farthest away.

Hopefully sometime between Saturday evening and Sunday Evening, I will find time to decorate and sleep.

Wishing you all A Safe Happy Weekend!!

We Can Do Hard Things

Now that I seem to be recooped enough to be back on a regular schedule, I've been catching up on some of the blogs I like to follow.

One of those blogs is called Momastery by Glennon, a writer and "mother of three and wife to one" (as she describes herself). It is a fabulous blog that is open, honest and sincere. Her writing has a softness to it, and it oozes love. Love for her family, her friends, her readers, people she doesn't even know and even life. Its those qualities that draw me to it. While reading one of her posts that was written a few days ago, I had an "Ah Ha! Moment" (as Oprah liked to call them).

The post titled, Dear Chase (click hear to read it in its entirety), is a letter to her son as he starts the third grade.  In the letter she is trying to teach him about compassion. God's compassion and how we can and should show it to others.

I will quote the "Ah Ha!" part here:

"Compassion might lead you to tell a teaser to stop it and then ask the teased kid to play. You might invite a left-out kid to sit next to you at lunch. You might choose a kid for your team first who usually gets chosen last. These things will be hard to do, but you can do hard things."

These things will be hard to do, but you can do hard things.  Wow! It's like a light bulb went off in my head, and not necessarily just about compassion, but about everything.  If something is Right, then it may be hard, but we still have the strength to do the right thing. We Can Do Hard. Wow, what a revelation for me! God has given us this gift. This ability. And we all should use it everyday!

I've noticed that she (Glennon) uses this phrase alot in some of her posts and even has a sign hanging up in her house with the phrase on it. It's like a mantra.  And a dang good one, if I may say so. 

This one sentence puts into words an explanation to the group of comments/questions that irks me to no end. (partially because I haven't been able to think of an answer that doesn't personally degrade the commentor)  That question is the often off-hand remark  from others in regard to the relationship that I maintain with my ex, his wife and thier other two children.  "Your a d***m good woman" or "Your a better woman than I am, because I couldn't do it." or "How on earth do you do that?"

What I've always WANTED to say but have refrained from is, "Really? You COULDN'T do it? Or is it more like you WOULDN'T do it? Come on, get over yourself. If you loved your child/children enough you could. It's only matter of putting your children first and above your own selfish desire to be a B****! So don't look down your nose like I"M the one in the wrong, because you are! (snap, snap)"

Unfortunately, that response would be a very quick way to alienate people. People who probably only mean to give me a pat on the back to acknowledge my choice, and not the smack on the nose that I take it to be.

But Now! ........... BUT NOW!! I have a better answer.  One that I CAN say!............

"Often times the things that are RIGHT are hard to do. But, with God, I Can Do Hard Things." 

And you know what?  I feel great about that answer. It sums it up pretty well.  Don't you think?

I also find that motto to be very inspiring for future decisions. 

Maybe I need a sign in my house, too.

:-)

Texted Sisters ~ Battle of the Bergere

(not really at battle nor a bergere, but it made a neat title)

ber·gère  /bərˈʒɛər; Fr. bɛrˈʒɛr/ [ber-zhair; Fr. ber-zher]  noun, plural -gères
A bergère is an enclosed upholstered French armchair with an upholstered back and armrests on upholstered frames. The seat frame is over-upholstered, but the rest of the wooden framing is exposed: it may be moulded or carved, and of beech painted or gilded or of fruitwood, walnut or mahogany with a waxed finish. Padded elbowrests may stand upon the armrests.


I came home after work today to these totally awesome chairs.

My sister picked these up at a local thrift shop a couple of years ago and
they DID NOT look like this. My aunt re-did them for her and had just delivered them
before I got home.  I sooo wish I had a before pic to share.

I was so super jealous as soon as I saw them.  So of course I immediately had to mess with my sister.  :-)

Me:  (Along with a pic of chairs) How much profit do you want????

Purple: oh my gosh! they look amazing! i LOVE them!

Me: but I WANT THEM!!! if u could only c my face right now i no u would sooooooo give in........

Purple: not a chance!

Me:    :(

Me: U never were a good sister

Purple:  i didnt have any good modeling
(this is completely untrue and low blow IMO)

Purple: ill let you look at them. no touching though

Me:  (i then sent her a pic of me sitting in one of the chairs and touching the other)

Purple: HEY! GET OFF MY CHAIR!!




Mom and I are currently taking bets on how fast she will come home to get them.  She wasn't planning on coming home again until Thanksgiving. I've got my money on next weekend. lol

Tomorrow, I think I will send her a pic of her chairs arranged in my bedroom, because they will match it perfectly!! HeHeHe!

TGIT! (Thank goodness it's Thursday!)

Only One More Day To Go!

I've tried to return to my regular schedule this week and I'm definitely ready for the weekend.  I know I was barely two weeks out, but hey the Doc gave me my driving privileges back, so that means the same as return to normal right??  :)

No, I didn't ask specifically, but he didn't specifically say I couldn't either.

I admit I may be pushing it just a little bit, but I think I'm fine.  I'm just starting to wear down and I think I'll stay on the down low this weekend.  (because that's so different from most of my other weekends...lol)

So, you ask, what has my schedule been like this week? (Well you didn't really, but I'm going to tell you anyway.)

Sunday - Church AM & PM
Monday - Work 8-5, Ty (Karate) 6-7
Tuesday - Work 8-5, Ty (Soccer) 7-8
Wednesday - Work 8-5, Church 7-8
Thursday- Work 8-5, Ty (Soccer) 7-8
Tomorrow NOTHING :))
Don't forget the homework every night!!

Those of you who may have actually visited here before, are probably thinking "but Tuesday and Thursday your son is at his Dad's, so your off the hook".

Of course not. I must go to the practices because I'm his Mom, and that's what Mom's do. Right?? Right.  OK I realize that I don't have to.  And maybe his Dad and Lilly might prefer I didn't.  (I have nothing to base this theory on, just kinda throwing the possibility out there. I'm pretty sure it's not true. I'm sure they love sharing every Ty moment with me.)

It's probably just another one of my issues.  Me being the helicopter parent again. 

OK, I don't really hover. I'm just there. In case he needs me. Really close.

Ha! Just Kidding!

I just can't imagine something happening and me not being there.  Whether it be an injury or an amazing play. I want to be there.

Even if I am tired.  :)

The super good news though is that I've recovered enough that I'm soooo missing my blog.  So you can quit worrying.

I'm back!

Getting Back On Track

So sorry that I've been mostly MIA for two weeks.  I still can't believe how hard this surgery has been on me.  I've been working half days this week trying to get back into a regular routine, but after 5 or 6 hours up and about, I'm am exhausted.

I had my 1st post-op followup on Wednesday and the Doc was thrilled with my healing and how well I'm moving around.  I couldn't help thinking that if I'm doing that well then I truly feel sorry for everyone else.  I admit I am moving around pretty well though.  It's just getting tired that sucks so bad.  Of course I'm sure most people probably wouldn't be stretching themselves so thin by returning to work so soon, but I just can't help myself.  The guilt that I plague myself with when I'm not here is much, much worse than the exhaustion. :)

Now I am ready to get back on track with my blog.  I've really missed it, but I've been entirely too tired to even think rationally let alone publish anything in writing.  Seriously, I paid two bills last week when I got home, and then SEVERAL days later realized I had mailed them WITHOUT the checks.  Crazy, huh?

During my recovery, my wonderful sister stayed with me for a while.  During this stay, we came up with an idea to train for a 5K! I was on pain medication. I'm not sure what her excuse is. ;-)

My sister is already an avid walker and I have managed to work myself back up to 1 1/2 miles since my surgery.  Currently our plan is to officially begin training after my 6 week recovery is up.  She is already jogging a little bit, but I am going to continue to increase my endurance while walking until then.  Right now the mile and half is about all I can handle.  After that I start getting sore.

I'm super pumped about this idea!!  Its something I've always wanted to do, but never got around to.  Or never made it a priority rather.  Training with my sister will be great. Even though we are 6 hours apart, it will still give us some accountability and push us to train a little harder.

Now we just have to pick our 5K and push ourselves to our goal.

If you know of a 5K being planned for Spring 2012 somewhere between KY and NC, let me know!

The 7th Day of Recovery

WOW Guys!  I totally didn't expect to be out of the loop for so long.  This is Day 7, since my surgery, but it's the 1ST day that I've been able to function.

As a matter of fact, I came home on Sunday, and I set down to pay a few bills, but I discovered a few minutes ago that I totally hosed that up. lol

The best I can figure is that I sent two bills in ... WITHOUT THE CHECKS!!  :(
Seriously!  The bigger problem is that I'm not sure which two they were. lol.... I'm going to have to call in a little bit and see which out of the three actually received a check.  GEEZ!

I figured this out when I went to write my Mom a check this morning to pick me up some stuff while she was out.  So, I went to write it down in the register and realize there was a check not accounted for.  Then I realize I hadn't written down any of the bills I paid.  Sooo, 1 check and three bills.  Therefore I conclude I only sent one bill in with payment.

Anyway, I'll figure that out.

Just wanted to drop by and let you know that the surgery is over and behind me now and I am on the slow road to recovery. 

I'll be back to posting relevant topics soon, soon, soon. I promise!

The Night Before Surgery

My surgery is scheduled for bright and early for in the morning.  At the rate I'm going it looks like I may still be up because of this colon cleansing nonsense.  Geez. I don't think it will ever wear off.

Just wanted to stop by and say hi.  Gripe about the "poo med" and let you know that it might be a day or two before I post again. 

But for those of you who may be wondering. I'm still holding it together.

For the most part.

And it appears that I might actually do this, this time.


Seriously, I ask that each of you add me to your prayers.

I'll be back in no time!

Reflect on This

A few weeks ago, I wrote about Ty as my reflection.  How he was imitating me while we were brushing our teeth. Then I went on to express how that thought stressed me out and I was soooo sure that I was screwing up his entire life. 


Well, OK I didn't really go into all that so much,  as I just vaguely mentioned the enormous pressure I was feeling that he might actually be learning things from me.  You know, by example.  Eeek!

Well, today I experienced the yin to that yang.

I arrived to pick him up from school a little early today.  As I was waiting patiently for class to be over, I could observe him through the door.  I find it so strange, yet a little amazing, to watch him when he doesn't know I'm there.  I find its slightly uncomfortable to realize that he is a separate entity from me, as well.  That he walks, and talks and thinks, and reasons and makes decisions all by himself. 

During this rare and brief moment, this is what I saw:   I watched him interact with other children. I saw his personality bloom while making a joke with a friend.  I watched him struggle with a problem on his worksheet, then boldly get up to go ask the teacher to help him.  I watched his face light up as she helped him to figure it out.   I watched him be himself.

Be himself. All by himself. 

He did all of that without me. 

My child leads a life that is totally separate from me?!

I gave him life (his Dad and God may have had a little something to do with it too, but that's irrelevant to this discussion). 

I gave him life,  but he has taken it and made it his own.

Its so perfect and so heartbreaking at the same time.

My son, my beautiful son, who once needed me for everything just to simply survive, can do all of this on his own.

As he continues to grow, I'm sure he will change into someone I don't always understand.  He will baffle me, he will confuse me and I'm sure he will, at some point, break my heart. (You better not kiddo!) 

Nonetheless, I will always love him more than anything in the whole wide world.

Totally Freaking Out

OK I've have written and deleted this post about FIFTEEN different times.  I'm really struggling with it.  I kept thinking it was just the stress related to my upcoming procedure, or that I'm just having trouble writing about such a personal topic (Yeah right. I laugh in the face of personal modesty and dignity.) Then I realized that wasn't the problem at all.  The problem is that I have been trying to write this like I am a stable, rational thinking person.  So in order to fix that,I've decided to just tackle it head on.


Like the crazy person I am (or at least feel like lately).



Wednesday morning was my Pre-op appointment. Although to most people that not be that significant, but for me that means I am on the final countdown to my surgery. *~*

I am such nervous wreck.  Therefore I have been trying very hard to keep myself pre-occupied because...... well, because if I don't then I may seriously find myself camped out and hidden somewhere having a full-blown panic attack.

Wednesday evening was a Ty evening which also happened to coincide with the first day of school.  So it wasn't very difficult to stay distracted. We ate dinner together and I tried to get Ty to tell me about his day.  That was like pulling teeth as usual.  I ask a question and he shrugs and mumbles an answer. (Typical male) Of course when he decide he WANTS to tell me something, I can't get him to hush (also typical male, lol)

After he went to bed I spent a while making a list of things I need to do before my surgery and a list of things I may need to take with me.

Thursday evening, I had dinner and margaritas with a couple of girlfriends. Then I spent four hours with Dessa at the mall and Walmart.  I was so drained from the drinks and shopping that I just immediately crashed when I got home.

This weekend I painted an old bookcase I found in my moms attic and filled it with some of my favorite books.  Then I made a living will and wrote out a list of important stuff like where to find all of my life insurance policies and checking and savings account info. I watch a couple of movies and crashed pretty early.
So as active and distracted as I've been trying to keep myself for the last few days, you would think that I would be doing a good job staying calm or at least not focusing on being a paranoid crazy freak.

The truth is that as I am typing this I am completely freaking out.  I feel like I could simultaneously vomit and hyperventilate.  I'm light headed and nauseous.

Why? 


Well, because I'M GOING TO DIE!!!

Yes, that is actually what I keep thinking. I am going to die.  Next Thursday. During my surgery. Somehow.


The only rational thought that seems to be getting through is the fact that I was totally convinced I was not going to survive my pregnancy and c-section either.  I had it in my head that God's only purpose for me was to deliver this boy into the world and then my job would be done. And that ( obviously) didn't happen.

I know that this sounds like crazy talk.  And I guess it was/is.  I knew the complications and risks of my pregnancy. They were HUGE. Being convinced that it was going to happen was, in a way, my coping mechanism.  It was easier to believe and accept it than to fear and fight against the unknown.

That mechanism isn't going to work this time.  All I think about is leaving my son behind.  I was 21 when my Dad died and I STILL needed him.  Ty is only 5 so I know he still needs me.

Yep, I feel that I am on the edge of panic and the ground is slipping quickly.

I'm fighting the need to run full speed, screaming at the top of my lungs until I don't feel this fear anymore,

**** I just want to sleep. I want to crawl in bed and sleep until my surgery.  I can't panic if I'm sleeping. Right?*****

I'm sorry to throw all of this out there, but I figure you all are much better equipped to deal with this stuff than I am right now.  :-)

Please everyone, pray for me.  I'm so goof-headed right now I can't even concentrate enough in one straight line to pray for myself.  I get distracted thinking about DYING DURING MY SURGERY that I realize thirty minutes later that I didn't get much further than, "Dear Lord, Thank you for everything you do for me............." before my mind and imagination went AWOL.