I have a Surprise and I'm Bursting to Tell SOMEONE!

My little man is expected back today. 

I can't wait! I know it's only been a few days but it seems like FOREVER.

He is going to be so excited to see how I kept myself busy with while he was on vacation!

Oh don't worry. I'll share it with you, too.

Here's a hint......

What would a little boy who just moved need? 

One who is also a huge Harry Potter fan?

..................................

Why a Harry Potter Bedroom of course!!!

I have stayed up so late every night this week working on this room, that I am pretty sure I will pass out at my desk before the day is over. In order to do this quickly and on a tiny budget; I have cut, pasted and painted for three days trying to make most of the decorations. For almost every project I worked with materials I already had. I reused and/or recycled everything from styrofoam that was in the garbage to the old twin size bunk beds (unbunked of course) that were mine and my sisters when we were kids. I am stiff and exhausted.Oh well, it will be totally worth it just to see the look on his face when he first sees it.

As hard as I worked I still didn't get finished, so my sister is going to put a few finishing touches on it today while I am at work. 

(She's pretty terrific that way.)

Wishing You A Fantastic Friday!!!

The big reveal isn't until this evening, then we're off to a family dinner at my aunts. I'll be sure to post pics, but it may be either late tonight or tomorrow.

I'm a Mother, I worry. It's what I do.

I know I worry too much.

I know that I obsess over things that needn't be obsessed over. 

I know this AND I admit it. It's part of my G.A.D. ..............

..................but please, Please, PLEASE don't tell me that I'm being silly!

These are real fears.  Real fears for Real things. 

It's not like I'm worried about the monsters under my bed or anything.

Wait let me back up to this morning and to the incident that has initiated this little rant.

I awoke about thirty minutes early this morning, because I wanted to spend a few extra minutes with Ty. I was supposed to drop him off at his Daddy & Lilly's on my way to work, then they would all be heading to Gatlinburg for a few days of vacation.

So I hurried up, showered, dressed and what have ya.  After pulling that off in record time, I then commenced to getting Ty up and ready.  As I was gooping up his Mohawk, I starting talking to him about how important it was that he get back home to me safely.  I stressed that he had to be extra careful while traveling.  To make sure that he doesn't run ahead of Daddy and Lilly or get distracted  by something and not keep up with them.  I reminded him that it was super important not to talk to strangers and that all bad guys don't necessarily look like Two-Face from Batman.

As I was reciting all of this to him, someone (who's first name is My and last name is Mother) walked by and told me to quit being silly. She said that I was only "projecting my anxiety".

WTF!!!

So have I only IMAGINED seeing those missing kids on milk cartons?  Are Amber alerts only an urban legend?

I don't think so!

I understand that my Mom (oops, I mean 'Someone') was only trying to keep me from scaring Ty and possibly even trying to make me feel better.  The problem is, that she has no idea what it feels like to have your baby away from you. To feel helpless and afraid of a situation that is out of your control.

Fortunately for her (and my sister and myself), she and my Dad stayed married. Therefore, there were never any separate vacations.  She never had to send her baby off without her. I'm even sure I was in like the 5th or 6th grade before I even went to the mall with out her. 

Let me specify here that I'm not concerned that his Dad or Lilly won't take good care of him.  I KNOW they will.  They love him, care for him and worry about him the same as I do. I'm not worried about lack of care here.  I'm worried that even in the best of circumstances things can go wrong. 

I'm not being silly. Just ask any parent of a missing or abducted child.

I also understand "someone's" ill attempt to ease my mind. I do understand that.  I understand that from her perspective it is "silly" to worry over what you cannot change. 

I wish I didn't worry so much. I wish I could just enjoy the next couple of days instead of spending it feeling like my guts are caught in a wringer.  I really, really do.

But it's who I am, and what I do.

As a Mother and as Me.

P.S.  ~ I know your thinking, "Wow! She just moved in over the weekend and she's already upset at her Mom."  But that's not exactly true.  I am venting, yes, but I'm not really upset with her.  I understand that she is my Mother, and that "roles" die hard.  It's hard for her to see me doing something that she herself doesn't necessarily agree with and NOT "correct" me for it.  I understand that.  I also understand that with a little admonishment, corporal punishment and correcting hard work,determination and patience this too will change.

Full Circle

Creed is definitely not a new band, and even their most recent album is at least a year old. 

However, this song is speaking to me at this time. Maybe its because I feel like I am coming full circle in my own life. I've reached the point where I'm ready to take those final steps in healing, forgiving and moving on. 

I don't believe it's about closure. I feel as though its leaving behind the old as you move forward to start another journey.

Well, that's what my crackhead thoughts are telling me today, anyway.

Who knows, tomorrow, they may tell me that I should go do donuts in my neighbors yard.

J/K~ I'm not that random yet.

My Reflection

Last night, as Ty and I were getting ready for bed, I had another OMG Mommy moment. We were standing side by side brushing our teeth.  I was in one of my usual head-in-the-clouds kind of daze when out of the corner of my eye something caught my attention.

I noticed that Ty was watching my reflection in the mirror as he was brushing his teeth.  Then I realized that he wasn't JUST watching my reflection, he was imitating it.  Stoke for stroke, brush for brush, he was doing everything I was. 

A feeling of pride and love came over me as I watched him so intently trying to get the tops and bottoms, fronts and backs and even his tongue just exactly like I was.  I couldn't believe that someone so gorgeous, so smart and so nearly perfect would want to be anything like me. I was so proud of myself for setting such a good example, and that he "caught" me when I was doing it perfectly.
Not that I ever brush my teeth imperfectly ;-)

Then suddenly it was like being drenched in a cold shower.

What else is he imitating?  How often is he watching me?

What examples am I setting when I don't realize he is watching?

Does he hear me when I mumble curse words under my breath?  Does he see how fast I can lose my temper? Does he realize how many times I skip church because I need to do something else?

To be perfectly honest, this scares me. Those thoughts have sent my mind into overdrive and I'm not really sure what the outcome of this thought process will be. 

Its amazing how you can 'know' something on the surface, but when it reaches a different, deeper level of your mind it takes on a whole new, much deeper meaning.

Jalapeno Chicken Dip

I have been invited to a Ladies Only Cookout this evening by one of the women's Sunday school classes at church. 

Recently, I have been trying to become thinking about becoming more involved in church and its extra-curriculars. Unfortunately, I haven't yet managed to make it to a Sunday school class.  Its been on the list, but I'm am so good at procrastination. Anyway, I was flattered that they thought to invite me.  At first, I politely declined after expressing my joy at receiving the invitation, because I felt that I had entirely too much to do with my upcoming move this week.  (Yes, only 2 more days!! YEAH!)

Yesterday evening, Mom and I were taking the legs off of my coffee and end tables, and I was telling (I'm sure she would say it sounded more like whining) her that I wished the cookout was next week, because I would really like to have gone. 

She just laughed and said "you'll not have time to go next week either, or the one after for that matter". 

And you know what?

She's so right.  So, I got up right then and went and made a phone call to confirm my attendance for the cookout this evening. 

I'm so excited!

So anyway, now for what this post is actually about!

It is a bring-your-fave-dish kinda thing, so I am taking Jalapeno Chicken Dip.  I thought I would share the recipe with you, just in case you have a last minute invite you need to go to. :-)

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Jalapeno Chicken Dip Recipe

2   8 oz.  Blocks of Cream Cheese
1   10 oz Can of Chicken Breast
1             Can of Cream of Chicken Soup
3   Tbl.    Chopped Jalapenos


Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.

Mix Cream Cheese, Chicken Breast, Cream of Chicken Soup and Jalapenos with electric mixer.  Blend all ingredients together well.  Pour mixture into a small casserole dish and back for approx. 20-25 minutes.

The top of the mixture will begin to bubble, then brown. (I always say its done when it gets that homemade cheese cake look. But it doesn't have to be 'done' all the way through like cheese cake.  Its a dip remember.) 

Serve warm with crackers.

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I hope you enjoy!

I've been thinking about sprinkling shredded cheddar cheese on top before baking. If someone gets around to trying it before I do, I'd love to hear about it!

Kids and Money

Allowance?  Earned for chores? Yes/No?

What Age?

How Much?????

Lately, I've read several articles ranging from teaching your children basic money skills to whether or not an allowance is appropriate.  Of course EVERYONE is an expert and every expert has their own opinion of  what consists of the perfect formula.

I tend to do a lot of research (by that I mean I read a lot of blogs and articles) on whatever subject I am currently fixated on and then, in the end, I still do what I want.

So from what I have gathered up til now, here is what the experts say:

* Allowance is Good.
     It teaches money-management skills.
* Start Early
     Young children are more likely to listen and take parent's advice. 
* Don't pay your children to do chores.
     Children should do chores because they are a contributing part of the family, not for money.  Also, when  they get older and have part time jobs, then they may balk at doing chores.
* Don't pay them too little.
     If you don't pay them enough, then they really can't experiment and make mistakes.  And I don't know about you but in my case mistakes are where most of my learning came from.
* Determine what you expect the money to be used for and stick to it.
     Ex:  If the allowance is meant to cover all entertainment, and they spend it all on Monday, then they won't have money left on Friday for the movies.

OK, so maybe I'm not doing everything wrong according to my research, but I'm sure I'm still screwing up somehow. ;-)

Ty & I are taking our own approach to his money.  I'm teaching him to handle his money the same way I do my own.  I have Long Term Savings, Short Term Savings and a Checking Account. Therefore, Ty also has three stashes of money.


My long-term savings is exactly that. It is never to be touched unless it is a dire emergency, and so far nothing so important has occurred that I haven't figured a way around withdrawing from there. 
 My short-term savings is for things that I would like to do (like vacations), or buy (like a new TV) and also for unexpected problems (like having to replace one of my brand new tires already, because I busted it somehow).
 My checking account is for everything else, but unfortunately that is mainly bills. Yuck.


Since Ty doesn't have any bills, this is how his money stashes are broken down:

*Long-Term Savings (I have currently have control of. It goes in, but it doesn't come out.)
*Short-Term Savings (He chooses something he wants to save-up for. Right now its a trip to Harry Potters Wizarding World in FL)
*Pocket Money  (This is exactly like it sounds.  Its my solution to the "I want that!" problem that plagues all children.)


Birthday, holiday or other monetary gifts are split in half. One half of the money MUST be put into his long term savings. The other half is his choice.  He can either put it into his short-term savings or use it as pocket money. 


He earns money every evening (approx. $2.00) for doing his chores.  This money goes directly into his short -term savings. He is responsible for making sure all of his toys are picked up and put away before bed.  He also makes sure that the living room is picked up and back in order.

Ty is also extremely helpful anytime I need him.  He helps with laundry, my flower beds, helps cook, clean-up and anything in between.  That is why he only has a small list for daily chores (Besides he's only 5 for heaven's sake! Just how much more do you people expect?)

Any other money he receives is his pocket money.  He has his own wallet, which I actually keep in my purse, but the money is his. 

When we are in a store and he wants something, we get out his wallet and count his money.  Then I tell him whether he has enough or not.  I also tell him how much money he will have left. 

The kicker is that I let him decide whether he still wants it or not. Having to go without something tomorrow because he spent all of his money today is part of the learning process. 

We have been doing this long enough that he has grasped the idea, to some degree anyway,  that it takes a while to earn the money.  He is beginning to see that some things are worth spending his money on and some are not. 

I also make him use his own money in gas stations when he wants candy, or at department stores if he wants to ride those ridiculous rides. You know those $0.50 abominations sitting right outside every store, that children think they are entitled to ride JUST because they happen to be walking within 10 feet of one.   (By the way, that smile that is plastered all over your child's face while they slowly circle around or go up and down for 30 seconds IS NOT because those rides are that much fun.  Its there because they know they broke you down just a little bit more this time.  To them it's just another battle won in the struggle for power.  Damn that carousel horse!)

Anyway, back on topic. I haven't started giving him an actual weekly allowance yet, and I'm not sure that I will.

I feel as though it is my job to teach him the ways of the real world. One of those lessons is: Nothing in life is free.  I believe that you have to work for things, and I'm pretty sure that no one is going to be giving him an allowance when I'm dead and gone.  Unless, of course, my lotto numbers hit before then, and I can set up that trust fund. (I'm holding my breath.)

The one thing I am sure plenty of  'experts' would agree that I am screwing up on is that I happily use money as a form of bribery. I use it all of the time, for lots of things (mostly to get my way, without an argument).  The other evening, I even paid Ty 25 cents JUST to try a piece of celery dipped in ranch. He didn't like it, but at least he tried it.

I will even use it as an incentive for grades. (GASP!!) Yes, I know, that's horrible.  But is it really? My way of thinking, as deranged as it may seem, says that NO young kid really understands the importance of getting good grades and establishing the basic foundation for their future.  So, I figure the important part is to make sure it happens.

These are the things that Ty and I are doing right now.  I would really love, love, love to hear any other ideas you may have. 

Leave me a comment or shoot me a message on some of the things that you do.  I'm always looking for more creative ways to teach Ty about money.

NEW Dark Tower Book!!!

I AM SOOOO PUMPED!!!

Can't wait!

I had heard previously (a.k.a. I read on S.K.'s website because I often stalk that page) that Steve (yes, that's right, we are that close. In my imagination atleast, and Steve should be the last person who would ever judge someone for having a vivd imagination.) was writing another story for the Dark Tower series. 

Not an ending, but a fill-in-the middle kind of story. 

So, I just recieved an email from Cemetary Dance that he has announced it will be published April 2012.

The Novel is titled:
THE DARK TOWER: THE WIND THROUGH THE KEYHOLE

I am assuming the reason is because he has another book, 11/23/63, that is to be released in November of this year, and the publisher's probably don't want them competing.  Which is smart. I guess. I assume that there are possibly some people, who unlike myself, might only buy one or the other, but not both.   ;-)

I absolutely love, love, love Stephen King's writing.  I have always felt close to the characters in the Dark Tower series.  They seem so real, so 3 dimensional.  I especially like Roland.  I have a slight crush, I admit.  I've always had a thing for bad boy types who do what's right, above all else. 

No seriously, I have read The Dark Tower several times.  The first being when I was in high school.  All of the books hadn't even been written then. 

I am so excited to have another reason to go back and spend time with the people whom I feel are my friends.

CCSC Bluegrass Festival

July 14, 15 &16th

Carter County Shrine Club

Bluegrass Festival

If your in the area, this is one music festival you won't want to miss! 

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The Shrine Club fairgrounds are beautiful!

The music is great!

The fun is all around!

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Meet some new people and have a great time!

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It's a three day event you'll never forget!

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I'll be there!

Family Ties

This week one of my favorite aunts is visiting. She was married to my Mom's brother, but they have been divorced for approx. 17 years.  Almost 1/2 of my life.

So is she really still my aunt?

OF COURSE SHE IS!!!

I'd probably pick her over my uncle anyday!! Well not really, I'd just have to play Switzerland and remain neutral. He is my uncle and I do love him, I just don't know him as well as I do her.  He is one of those uber geniuses. As a bio-medical engineer he invented some stuff. Stuff thats way over my head or I'd tell you about it.  And to give props where they are due, it was his job and genius-ness that allowed her to be able to load the kids up and SPEND the entire summer here.

Anyway, it also means that he worked alot.  That kind of schedule is not very condusive for bonding with your niece, obviously.

But SHE did.

They always lived in Massachusetts, but every summer when school was out, she would load up her kids and come to the family farm here in KY. 

I spent every summer that I can remember, until thier divorce (which was also about the time I graduated H.S.), on that farm with her and her kids.  She took us water-skiing, let us sleep outside on an old hay trailer, have a camp fire and roast marshmallows nearly every night, she took us to horse shows and fed us funnel cakes. 

It is because of her that I developed a love for Early American History.  During the weeks that we would visit them, she would relentlessly drag us all over New England. (Salem was always my favorite. I STILL have to go there every time I visit.)  She exuberantly took us to experience as many places, and things as we could squeeze into our 7-10 day trips. I've seen Cheers (the real one), had my picture taken in the Pillory, saw Plymouth Rock, toured the Mayflower replica, took part in a Tea Party reinactment (no not this new polictical Tea Party, I mean tea being thrown over into the bay) and walked (yes walked) Paul Revere's Ride.

When her Mother was first diagnosed with Alzheimers; her daughter, my sister and myself were often put on what we lovingly referred to as "Gramsie Duty". We would stay with her, just to kind of check behind her. We made sure she remembered to turn things off and other small safety precautions.

It wasn't just the fun stuff, she wouldn't hesitate to discipline us either. She would put us in line just as fast as she would one of her own. The same as my parents would hers. (Although, we were such unbelievably well-behaved children that that wasn't much of an issue.)

She knows my birthday and still sends me a card every year.  Im 35, AND SHE STILL SENDS ME A CARD!! That takes commitment. I mean, I barely remember to get my mom and sister a card for thier birthdays.

I will never forget, when my ex and I first separated she sent me some flowers with a simple note. She had them delivered to my work. It meant so much because she KNEW, first hand, my hurt.

All of these things are only the tip of the iceberg of course.  They are just the ones that Floated to the top while I was writing. She was an immensely huge part of my childhood and adolesence.

I pray, that should God bless me with a niece or nephew, that I can follow in her footsteps as an aunt.  I would be proud to be that person. There are so many things that I want to be when I grow up (wink, wink). Yet, this goal, is very near the top of my bucket list. It's right under SuperMom and directly above independently wealthy.


Divorce Sucks. It is so often a loss to everyone involved.

I am glad I didn't lose this time. Not really. Cuz.....

She IS my family. She is (and always will be) my Aunt Sue Ann.

And I love her.

If I shot the neighbor's dog, does that make me a bad person?

OK! I didn't REALLY shoot the dog!


I could never actually do that. Unless I was in fear of life or limb or something equally as scary. But anyway, I DID shoot AT it.

With a BB gun.

Twice.

Right behind its butt.

Little bits of dirt pelted it right in the rear.

(There were three of them, but I only had time to reprimand one, before they ran away.)

So, I'm sure you're wondering what these neighborly pooches did to send me into such an evil rage.

Did they growl or bark at me?
No.

Did they intimidate me in any way?
No.

Did they destroy my property?
Well, not destroy really. But they have left their calling card several times before.

So what were they doing?
THEY! WERE! LAYING! IN! MY FLOWER! BED!!!!

After my early spring back injury that left me unable to do anything of substance for several weeks, I have been working overtime on getting my house in back in order. The inside and outside.  Especially the flowers and landscaping!  It doesn't take long for things to get out of control in the early part of growing season, and it has just about worked me to death trying to make up for it.

So, back to the dog incident......

I pulled into my driveway yesterday evening (after an excruciatingly stressful day at work) and see THREE, not one, but THREE dogs stretched out in my new mulch, SQUASHING MY HOSTAS!

OH THE RAGE!!!

Keep in mind that these are not your typical lap size dogs either. Two of the perpetrators are average size dogs, maybe about 35 pounds, the third however is quite large. Not mastiff large, but pretty dang big.  I guess-timate about 85-90 pounds, and she (he maybe, I dunno) looks like a huskie or at least what I think a huskie should look like.

As soon as I got out of the car, I walked to the front yard and tried to run them off.  I stomped my feet repeatedly, clapped my hands and yelled "Get! Get out of here!"

(That is the universal language for running dogs off isn't it?  Yes, I know it is because I have been using it for years. It always works, just like "Scat" works for cats.)

Well, this time it didn't work! Do you know what that big, fat, lazy dog actually had the gall to DO? 

It, ever so barely, raised its head up off of my freshly laid mulch, slightly tilted its head in my direction, huffed (YES, it HUFFED!), turned its head back and let it plop right back down!

I was FURIOUS! How DARE that dog blow me off like that!

I stalked off into the house all the while mumbling that I would certainly show THAT dog who was boss around here.  I was gonna shoot it!

Well, of course I could never really shoot it. Its not the dogs fault really. Blaming the dog would be like blaming a child who has never been taught not to be rude.  It's the owners fault.

What I wanted to do was march right over to the neighbors house, knock on his door and remind him that I don't allow my son to play in his yard and poop on his steps and that I would greatly appreciate the same from his dogs.

Unfortunately, I'm not 100% sure whose dogs they are. I have a pretty good idea, but I'm not positive. I see them going to and fro from one particular house more than any others. It is also the direction that I hear barking at night.

(I also remembered that I was moving soon, and it would be wise just not to rock the boat. Unfortuantely, I didn't remember that until after I had already scared the bejeezus out of the dog.)

 

These dogs do not have a collar (including flea collars), which tells me that they are most likely not vaccinated, or wormed, or even loved. I do not know their temperament. (Although, they may understandably become more aggressive towards me since this BB event.) I simply do not know these dogs, and I do not want them around my house.

Pets are a RESPONSIBILITY and that responsibility includes more than putting some food and water in a bowl everyday. It's so sad that we have to have a license for almost everything, except any jerk can be a pet owner or a parent.

Just FYI:  I am not an animal hater.  I love dogs, but I am also a germ-a-phobe, so I don't like strange dogs.  During my life I have had 4 of the best dogs ever. (OK one was actually a terror. He was like a kid who was always getting into trouble, but could give you one look with his big blue eyes and you were so over it.) I loved them and I still miss them terribly, especially when I'm sitting still.  I miss hearing their breathing and reaching down to pat their head while I'm reading or watching TV. It always comforted me to know they were there.  :(   But I was responsible for them.  They received regular vet care, were well groomed, and were constantly lavished with love.  They were NEVER allowed into other people's yards. In fact they were never outside without my direct supervision, except for a few rare occasions when  they were in a fenced in area.



How to Open A Can of Worms

STEP 1:  OPEN MOUTH

This conversation took place while I was helping Ty practice his karate.  We were working on his roundhouse kick and I (was not paying attention to where I was holding the pillow and) got kicked.

Ty:   Oops Sorry Mom, I didn't mean to kick you in the balls.

Me: (without thinking)    Girls don't have balls.

That sound you just heard. THAT was the sound of me opening a can of worms that I was not prepared for.

Ty:   That's what Dad said. But...... what DO girl's have?

Me:   Uh, ...... they have girl parts.

Oh yes, that's me. Always ready with smart, intelligent answers. I bet you all can't wait to get in line to give me an opportunity to educate YOUR child.

Ty:    What kind of girl parts?

Me: (Nervous, Sweating, and wishing I was anywhere but in the middle of this conversation.)  Uh... you know boys have a penis, and girls have...... well they...... well they don't have a penis, they have girl parts.

Yes, the answers just get better don't they.

Ty: (Just looks at me like I said 'water is wet'.)

Me:   OK, OK.  Here's the thing Ty. I've always said that if a child is old enough to ask, then they are old enough to know. I'm just not sure how much information is age appropriate for you and just EXACTLY how to explain it all. Sooooo, if you  PROMISE not to go around talking about this to anyone, ESPECIALLY your friends and Sunday School teachers, then we will talk about it.

Ty:    Why can't I talk about it?

Me:    Well, you can to me, and Grammy, and Daddy and Lilly.  Just not to other people who may not understand. Besides if you talk to other people about it, they may tell you things that are not true. So, if you have questions, then its best to talk to one of us. OK?

Ty:    OK, I won't.

Me:   Well, then as you know. Boys have a penis ...

Ty:     AND BALLS!

Me:    Yes, and balls, but they are really called scrotums, I think.  Anyway, they are on the outside. Right?

Ty:     (hesitantly)  They're on the inside of my underwear.

Me:   OH, no I mean they are on they OUTSIDE of your BODY.  You know they hang down. Right?

Ty:   Ohhhhh, yeah, your right Mom. Like your boobs?

Me:   (Awesome, the kid hits me with yet another esteem booster.)  Yeah I guess, but anyway, A Girl's part is called a Vagina and its more on the inside than the outside. 

Ty:  (Ponders this information for a few minutes.)  So why?

Me:   Why what?

Ty:    Why are boys and girls made different?

Me:   Because that's how God lets us make babies.

Ty:   Oh, OK.

WHACK!!!

(Roundhouse to the thigh.)

Ty: (Laughing hysterically)   Remember, your not supposed to let your guard down Mom.

Me:    Yeah, well your always catching me with my guard down.

Ty:    Don't worry Mom, I won't talk to anyone about a girl's  (slight pause).....Vegetable, or whatever you called it.

Me:   Good (and what I thought was under my breath) and don't think about taking up gardening either.

Ty:   Why would I want to be a gardener? (Thinks for a minute, and then said, laughingly) Oh vegetable!!! I get it!, You're so silly Mommy.

Me:  It's Vagina, Ty, NOT Vegetable.

So, now if you will excuse me, I am going to Amazon to find books on how to talk to kids about sex. Hopefully, I can educate myself before I do anymore damage.

 Do they make them for Kindergartners?

Might as well look for one on drugs and alcohol too.

Geez, they aren't exaggerating when they say they grow up fast!

COUNTDOWN TO MOVING DAY:
16 DAYS

NOTE TO SELF:  Do not make derogatory comments. Even when he doesn't get them, he gets them.

Getting My Cart Before My Horse

I mentioned a few months ago, that I had made up my mind to sell my house and move closer into town. I have been working on this goal ever since then.

Slowly.

You see, in my overly optimistic mind, I imagined that my house would have been ready to put on the market by now.

But its not.

Actually, its far from it.

Now, school will be starting in a month, and I have my uterus removal scheduled mid-August. So I've decided to go ahead and move in with my Mom, and work on the house in my spare time.

At least that way I won't be doing the same things over and over. Like picking up toys, doing laundry, cleaning up spills, etc. etc. 

As much as I hate to admit it.  I can't help feel like I'm taking the easy way out.  It kinda bums me out.  I've always prided myself in my ability to do things on my own, making my own way and not asking for help.

My Mama Susie raised 5 hell-raising boys with no more help than her young sister (def. no help from her ex-husband, my Grandfather, but he never did earn that title as far as I'm concerned.). She raised them and raised them well. And I whine around about how hard it is for me with Ty (who causes me no problems speak of) and he is at his Dad's 3 Nights a week!!

Do you see why I kinda feel bummed and maybe not so proud?

Well, I need help.  And this time I'm going to take it.  There is no sense in my child suffering due to my bull-headed pride. 

I guess it's not that I Can't do this on my own, it's more that I just don't want to anymore.  I stress over trying to do it all, trying to be supermom and keep a house up inside and outside, fixing things myself when they tear up, cook decent dinners, have plenty of quality time with Ty, not miss a Karate class or any other activity he may be involved in, and work 40-50 hours a week.  All the while maintaining a great attitude and never loosing my patience with Ty. (Oops, that doesn't always happen.)

Its no wonder I've let myself go. I haven't even had time to think about exercising. 

Besides, my mom WANTS me to move in.  She keeps suggesting that its a positive thing for her as well and says she needs me as much as I need her.  (Makes me wonder what she's not telling me??, lol)

Anyway, I've decided to just do it. So, I set the move in date for Saturday July 23rd.  I'm not really moving that much stuff anyway.  Mostly just my living room stuff, because Ty and I will have our own TV room there. I'm leaving most everything else until the house sells, so it will be sorta-kinda staged.  I'm re-furbing some furniture for Ty's new bedroom (it's time to upgrade from the toddler bed).  I'm not taking my bedroom furniture yet, because I'll be sleeping on the couch (or in one of Mom's spare bedrooms) while I do some remodeling to the room I want. Which, unfortunately, I can't do until I'm finished with all of the projects at my house.

I know, I know!  But I don't care. I'm tired. So, I'm doing it anyway. :-p

COUNTDOWN TO MOVING DAY:

17 DAYS



Happy Fourth!!!

Note:  As usual my internet would not stay connected long enough to post this last night. So I had to wait till today, when I could travel into town.   I CAN'T WAIT TO MOVE!!!

Credit: Free images from acobox.com

HAPPY FOURTH EVERYONE!!!

I've been busy Pool Party-ing, BBQ-ing, Parade going & Firework watching!! I'll catch up with you in a few days.

Someday - A Civil War Drama

Please Note: This is a stock photo, not an actual cast member from SOMEDAY.
I wasn't smart enough to remember my camera. As usual.

Credit: Free images from acobox.com



Last Saturday evening I went, along with my Mom and Ty, to the last performance of "Someday"

Below is what I stole borrowed from the OH Sesquicentennial website. Which you can go check out for yourself here.  It's just that they had already described it so eloquently, that I could never have done it the same justice.  :-) And I'm lazy... I really just want to get past the intro/background brew-ha and just put in my two cents worth.  :-))

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"The turmoil of war and the pathos of separated lovers come to life in the

Civil War music drama, Someday."

“Someday the war will end friends will be friends again,

and we will be together.”

War is war, wherever the place and whatever the time.  But when it touches your land and your family, its full impact hits home.  This was the experience of the people who lived in Carter County years ago.
The Civil War was fought here, in northeastern Kentucky, where the passions of divided loyalties strong emotion.
The stories of that time have passed through the generations.  One fascinating true-life drama is remembered by a descendant of a family whose course coincided with the path of War. 
The tale begins when the Confederacy was moving to secure the border state of Kentucky, where it had many supporters, but also many enemies.
It is summer 1862.  A young confederate officer Tom Clay, is sent home to Eastern Kentucky.  He is to form a group of Partisan Rangers to harass the Union forces occupying the area. 
Tom meets his sweetheart, Ann Rice, at a square dance.  A conflict arises between Tom and Ann’s Father, Bert Rice.  Bert is strongly pro-Union.  He sees Tom, his former friend, as a traitor to his country. 
Bert tells his daughter to forget Tom Clay.  Strong willed and deeply in love, Ann leaves home rather than give up her love for Tom.
After the Union forces are ambushed by Tom’s men, Bert helps formulate a plan for Tom’s capture.
Be ready to hold on to your emotions at the thrilling conclusion of “Someday!”
 
About the Author
“Someday” Outdoor Drama is a musical-drama written in 1990 by Robert Lee Harris.  “Someday” was written for the Kentucky Bi-Centennial and was first performed at Grayson Lake State Park during the summer of 1991.
Harris, who is a retired public school music teacher, a writer and composer, wrote the drama based on the life and times of people in the Eastern Kentucky are during the Civil War years.
The main character of the play, Tom Clay, is loosely based on the life of Hiram Rice, Harris’ great-great grandfather.  Rice was a County Attorney in Carter County and was a member Field’s Partisan Rangers.
“Someday”, which Harris also directed for several years, was subsequently performed for 12 seasons at Grayson Lake State Park.  Cast and crew numbered to over 50 with several members participating each season.

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FYI - Mr. Harris was my elementary school music teacher as well. I'm not sure how many years he did so, but during 7th and 8th grade years, he wrote plays for us to perform.  They were pretty cool.  I actually had the part of 'the gang-leaders girlfriend' in one. LOL. What fun memories!



So anyway, they brought the play out of retirement and did a few "encore" performances of Someday for the Olive Hill Sesquicentennial Celebration.  It's sad to say that in the twelve years that it was performed, I never went to see it.  I'm sure my reasoning was very sound, and my schedule was just too hectic to attend back then. (Honestly, had they served beer, I probably would have had season tickets.)

I am very glad I went this time. It really is a good story. As much as I love history, I'm not much on the Civil War. I find it too depressing, so I am sure that is one reason I had never been to see it.  This time though, one of my cousins had a part, so I had to attend.

Minus an occasional sound problem, it was very well done.  (It was probably only a problem for those of us with hearing problems. My Momma tried to tell me that loud music would destroy my hearing, but as usual I wasn't listening. Just another lesson, among many, learned the hard way. )

Ty , nearly a week later, is still going around the house singing:

                                    "He's a dirty, rotten rebel
                                     He's a dirty, rotten rebel
                                     And he deserves no better than he gets"

I have to give another big high-five to the people in my community who worked so hard in putting this outdoor drama on.  I have discovered there are many, many talented people in my small town.

Great Job Everyone!

Life through Rose Colored Glasses

Credit: Free images from acobox.com

My beautiful, wonderfully all-knowing sister is always telling me that I self-medicate with alcohol.  She simply insists that I use it as a coping mechanism. (She has her PhD in Counselors Education, which translates to her educating me about needing counseling.) But that's OK, I love her dearly.

And she's right.

I really do.  When life gets a little too mucky, or the walls feel as thought they are pressing in just a little too hard, I fix myself a drink.

Ok, ok, OK!  I fix myself LOTS of drinks.  You see, I don't just have one drink to help ease the tension or stress, I wash it fully away.  It's like a tidal wave of alcohol, just swooshing down to to drown out what ails me.

(Please keep in mind that my child is at his Dad's no less than three nights a week. That's plenty of time to "self-medicate" without drinking when my son is around. So please do not assume that I am neglecting, or endangering anyone but myself.)

Yet, recently I believe that I now know WHY I did that.  IT'S BECAUSE IT WORKED! 

So, what's the problem?

Well, for inquiring minds that want to know; I quit smoking at the first of the year. 

I just gave them up.  After 20 years of at least a pack-a-day habit, I just put them down and I really haven't missed them at all.

Unless I'm having a drink.

Yes, it's like cigarettes where just MADE to go with alcohol.  They just taste so dang good together. 

Ahhhh! I can feel the sensation.

I really wanted to quit smoking though, so I have not even been socially drinking.  That means no beer at the pig roast. No hanging out at B'dubs with my friends.  I only had a couple of drinks at RudyFest last Friday night.

I just can't fight the urge not to smoke, especially after more than a couple of drinks. 

......blah......blah.....blah.....skip ahead to this morning......

OK, so I've been taking the little Rx the doc gave me. Its been almost a week. (It took me a week to get my nerve up enough to take it.) 

I can't tell its helping at all. 

It might be. I might be an even bigger mess if I hadn't started taking it, but I don't think so. I still am fighting tooth and nail to keep from assuming the fetal position in my bed every evening.  (I'm winning approximately 2 out of 3 nights.)

Ok, OK!

You're right. Again.  The scrip calls for 2 a day and I've only been taking one.

I can't help it. I'm a big fat chicken.

I don't know what these pills will do to me. How they will make me feel. (Other than sleepy. That one, I've figured out.)

I do KNOW how a big ol' margarita will make me feel!  Just dandy!  Like I've got my shit together, and ready to take on the world!

AND I know it will make me want a cigarette.  And I don't know what the side effects of mixing alcohol with my new pills will do. (Probably make me sleepier, faster.)

I haven't even looked up the side-effects to this new med, because I was afraid my over-eager imagination would anxietize me into having some (or all).  I had my sis research it, and told her to keep an eye and ear open for anything that I might do or say.  Then she could tell me if I need to seek medical assistance. :)

Yes, I know I am a mess. My nerves are shot and I just can't deal. 

With anything.

I know this and I keep telling anyone who will listen to me.  But mostly no one believes me.  People seem to think that if you can see what a mess you are, then you SHOULD be able to straighten up.  I think that mind set comes from, well from ignorance for one, but from those 12-step programs where admitting you have a problem is the first step.

Well, it might be the FIRST step, but it ain't the only one. 

I guess, I should try taking the meds as prescribed. Not doing so only makes ME look ignorant.

(**sigh**)




Although, I REALLY would like to have a Big, Salty, Tangy, Tequila loaded Margarita!

(**bigger sigh**)


Credit: Free images from acobox.com