I am such a dork. I can not believe that I am actually emotional over this but, I guess I am. Today, is Ty's last day of school this year. His FIRST, last day of school.
On the surface that should be a good thing. Meaning, he has many more last days of school, Right? You would think so but, for my hormonal roller coaster of a brain, it means he already has 1 year behind him. It means he will be in Kindergarten in just a few short months. I just can't believe how fast this year has gone by and that means he is growing up waaayyy too fast.
When I hold him in my lap when we read or sometimes when I just sit and watch him sleep, I don't see a school boy. I see is the smoothness of his skin, and the baby fat that rounds his features. I see chubby hands and fingers. I see a baby. My baby.
This parenting thing is oodles tougher than anyone ever let on. I can handle the discipline side to parenting, and the worries, and the work, and the sacrifices. For me, the hardest part is feeling a love so deep and so true fill up my heart until I don't think I can stand it any longer. My heart feels as though it may burst at any moment. It not only takes my breath away, it takes away the ability to breathe. It overwhelms me.
Actually, it pretty much just scares the crap out of me.
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